The black needles of the pine trees were dusted with snow, and the air was fragrant from resin.
Forest Dark, Nicole Krauss
Before putting this sentence under a microscope, revel for a moment in the sensation that it creates. For me, the feeling is calmness, ease, a sense of balance--loveliness. Given what’s going on in the world, what a relief to float around in this sentence for a moment.
What is going on in this sentence?
The Making (a matching game)
It’s a compound sentence, which has at least two independent clauses, connected by a conjunction or semicolon.
#1: The black needles of the pine trees were dusted with snow
#2: and the air was fragrant from resin
Krauss uses parallelism, also known as parallel structure. It’s when phrases in a sentence have similar or the same grammatical structure.
The effect is balance and clarity. It also gives phrases a pattern and rhythm.
For example:
That’s one step for man, one giant leap for mankind.
One step (action) for (preposition) man (noun)… one leap (action) for (preposition) mankind (noun).
In Krauss’ sentence we have:
The needles (subject) were dusted (linking verb plus adjective) with (preposition) snow (subject complement)
The air (subject) was fragrant (linking verb plus adjective) from (preposition) resin (subject complement)
Our brains like patterns, and they like pairings. Maybe it appeals to our inclination for binary thinking: good/bad; soft/hard; day/night; cold/hot. Maybe it makes us feel in control in the face of chaos. If you know, let me know.
As you make your sentence, you can use some of the other style techniques in Krauss’:
Though the sentence creates calm, there is a hint of tension. At the beginning of the sentence, she uses harsher sounds, called plosives or mutes: b,d,t,d. (black, needles, pine, trees, dusted)
The sentence sound begins to change at the word “snow.” It becomes softer with “air” and the alliteration “fragrant” “from” and “resin.”
There’s assonance with “needles” and “trees.”
The cluster of hard stresses at the beginning slows the sentence down, but it changes its tempo, picking up speed after the word “snow.”
The BLACK NEEdles of the PINE TREES were DUSted with SNOW, and the AIR was FRAgrant from RESin.
Your turn. Tell me how it goes. Or post your sentence in the comment section. I’d love to see what you make!
Hi, Nina! I read this post a day or two ago, and can’t stop thinking about it.
Had I written this sentence, I would have immediately backspaced and changed “fragrant from” to “fragrant with,” because -- though I do love alliteration -- my inner ear is attracted to the symmetry and cadence of “dusted with snow... fragrant with resin.” I would have made my edit in satisfaction, and moved on without a second thought. Yet, Krauss’s choice is so compelling, I’ve given it not only second, but third, fourth, and many other thoughts.
Can you help me understand why? Why does this stay with me? Is it just the alliteration? Is the defiance of my expectations and instincts part of its appeal? Or, is it something about the way “from” hints at objects in space, at a tangible resin-y source for the fragrance, while “with” would leave us nothing to grasp, just an ephemeral perfume floating on the air?
I can’t quite pin it down, and I would love your thoughts.
The black needles / of the pine trees → color and plosives impose an image in the mind
were dusted / with snow, → metaphor and sibilants and rhythm soften image and add sound of snow
and the air / was fragrant / from resin. → open vowels, sense of smell and air and lilting rhythm add wind-like sound
One can *feel* the cold and freshness and crispness of the image.